Feeling Lost After Achieving Your Goals?

July 17, 2024

Beyond Achievement: Finding Meaning After Reaching Your Goals

Feeling Lost After Achieving Your Goals? Do you feel like life has lost its meaning after achieving one or some of your goals? Do you find that setting new goals now feels difficult or meaningless? Or you don’t know what goal to set, where to go, and feel like nothing means anything anymore?

As a business and wellbeing coach, I’ve encountered many professionals who have reached a stage in their lives or careers where they start questioning the meaning of it all. They’ve set and achieved significant goals, only to find themselves asking, “What now?” This is a common experience among high achievers who have spent years driven by a desire to move away from perceived shortcomings or unmet needs.

The Achievement Illusion

Consider the examples of those who aim for recognition or success. You might think that being published in a prestigious magazine like Harper’s Bazaar, getting that promotion, winning an award, or photographing a celebrity would be the ultimate achievement, the answer to everything. Yet once you have achieved that goal you feel lost or a complete lack of meaning in life. It never brought you the fulfillment you were searching for and now you don’t even know what the meaning of your life is all about.

Often, these goals are driven by unresourceful thinking patterns, beliefs and unmet needs. Perhaps the desire for recognition stemmed from a childhood where acknowledgment was scarce. Perhaps the drive to pay off your mortgage was fueled by a deep-seated feeling of not feeling safe.

These drivers, rooted in a need to escape something negative, can propel us forward powerfully, but they can also leave us directionless and asking ‘What was it all for’? once the goal is achieved.

The Post-Achievement Void

When you achieve your goal, that fear that once drove you dissipates. Suddenly, you have safety, recognition, or abundance, and the question arises: “Now what?” If you’ve been motivated by a need to move away from fear, lack of money, or basic survival needs, achieving your goals can leave you in unfamiliar territory. You no longer have that driving force, and without it, you might feel a sense of meaninglessness.

The Shift to Moving Towards Positive Goals

This is where the journey of self-discovery begins. Transition from a “moving away from” mindset to a “moving towards” mindset. This shift involves identifying what you genuinely want to move towards in a positive and fulfilling way. It’s about setting goals that are driven by passion and purpose rather than fear and lack.

Awareness: The first step is awareness. Recognize that you’ve been driven by a need to move away from something such as fear, pain etc. This realization is crucial and empowers you to change your focus.
Exploration: Begin exploring what truly excites and inspires you. Browse through magazines, take walks in different environments, travel, and immerse yourself in new experiences. These activities can spark ideas about what you want to move toward. Remember, this process takes time, and changing your thinking patterns requires patience. Be kind to yourself as you learn to envision what you want to create in your life and career.
Goal Setting: Begin to write down what you want to achieve. Create a “move towards” list. Think about who you want to be and what kind of life you want to lead. This might include aspirations like having a healthy and strong body, enjoying more time off, giving back, finding a more fulfilling career, or deepening your spiritual practice.

Feeling Lost After Achieving Your Goals? Here Are Some Practical Steps to Discovering Your New Goals

To help you through this process, consider these practical steps:

Reflect on Your Achievements: Understand the motivations behind your past goals. Celebrate the achievements you accomplished.
Dream Freely: Allow yourself to dream without limitations. What would you pursue if there were no obstacles?
Seek Inspiration: Find inspiration in books, articles, and conversations with others who have made similar transitions. Perhaps review what you loved as a child.
Experiment and Adapt: Try out new hobbies or activities to see what resonates with you. Be open to changing your goals as you learn more about yourself.

Find Meaning in the World Around You

Consider what holds significance in your life and the world around you. Reflect on your values, passions, and the impact you want to make. Ask yourself: What moments or experiences resonate deeply with me? What causes or issues ignite my curiosity or compassion? Engaging with these questions can help clarify your sense of purpose and guide your goal-setting. Look for ways to integrate meaningful activities into your daily life, whether through volunteering, creative projects, or simply connecting with nature.

Summary

Transitioning from a “moving away” mindset to one focused on moving towards positive goals is a profound journey of self-discovery. It’s about redefining success and finding fulfillment in new, purposeful ways. As you navigate this unfamiliar territory, remember that it’s an ongoing process. Stay patient and kind to yourself, and gradually, you’ll find clarity and direction in your newfound freedom.

By embracing this mindset shift, you’ll not only achieve your goals but also enrich your life with meaning and purpose. As a coach, I’m here to support you every step of the way. Let’s embark on this journey together and discover what truly makes your heart sing.